You’re a sweet little man…until you take my parking space!

Sometimes I just want to look at the world and say, “Really?!”
“Honey, did you really think those pants were a good idea??”
“Black tights under white shorts?? Really?!”
“I have two items. You have a full buggy. You’re cutting in line?? Really?!”
“You saw me walking up to your checkout counter – you made eye contact!! – and you’re putting up the ‘Lane Closed’ sign?? Really?!”
But the clincher today was the little man who stole my parking space…three times!!
I was trying to make a last-minute, two-minute mad dash to the Dollar Store to get something I needed to decorate for the Valentines Banquet at church tomorrow. (The Dollar Store is actually one of my favorite places to get stuff like that. I walk through Michaels to get ideas, then go to the Dollar Store to see if I can make my idea cheaper.) I figured I would be able to avoid the V-Day craziness there, since surely no one would be doing their sweetheart shopping for a dollar. Boy, was I wrong! (And let me take this moment to say – on behalf of all women everywhere – if you are getting your Honey Bunches a Valentines Gift from the Dollar Store, you are “El, Mr. Cheapo”!!!! …probably soon to be “El, Mr. Single-o,” too…)

Anyway, I pulled into the parking lot, and it was packed! There was only one spot available at the very back. I zeroed in on the spot, and laid mental claim to that swatch of concrete. I had almost reached it, when a little old man in a tan SUV whipped around the corner of the row – going the wrong way, I might add – and stole my parking spot!! There was my “Really?!” moment – one of many in this encounter.
I pulled away, grumbling, and began circling the parking lot like a hungry vulture over roadkill on a busy highway. Finally, a spot opened up near the entrance of the store. I made a mad dash towards it, dodging pesky pedestrians who had the poor misfortune to get in my way. I was maneuvering down an aisle towards victory, when the same tan SUV pulled out of the stolen parking space and claimed the new one! “REALLY?!!” I yelled at the windshield. I hollered it again, when I swung around to claim my original stolen space, only to find that it had been taken by some poor, unsuspecting newcomer. Flabbergasted, frustrated, and fuming, I stalked (er…drove) over to the very empty handicapped spaces and waited for a spot to open up – all the while wondering why God had not afflicted me with some physical ailment that would come in handy at times like this.
After a few minutes of eternity, a spot opened up directly in front of Tan SUV Man. I floored it. That spot was mine. …Imagine my shock and utter stupefaction as I witnessed him pull forward and steal my parking spot FOR THE THIRD TIME!!
I whipped around, and quickly filled the vacated space before he could back up and straddle both spaces.
…Sometimes I think people just have it in for me…Really!


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